私はあなたをもう一度会いたい
by Life's a cookie
Summary: Saito x OC. There had only ever been one person that he truly loved. And she was gone.Starts during the Bakumatsu Era. this is not a Tokio fic.


**Disclaimer: **Okay, this is going to be one a one time thing so I won't repeat it at the start of every chapter. I do not own any characters that are mentioned in this story that may be part of Rurouni Kenshin or any other fictions. Although, however, Saito Hajime is a real person so no one owns him except maybe himself.

**Author's Notes: **Hello. Do read this before continuing. There are some things you need to know which would hopefully help when you're reading this. Firstly, I am trying to make it follow the Rurouni Kenshin timeline and be historically accurate. The Shinsengumi was only formed in 1863 and the Bakumatsu lasted between the years 1853 to 1867. There is no information stating when Hajime first entered the group but to be on the safe side since he becomes the third division captain in 1865, only two years after it's formed, I shall make him join in on the same year it was set up.

As for the setting and all, I know it's rather bad of me, but think and rely on Peacemaker Kurogane for character appearances and behaviors. Basically: Susumu, Hijikata, Kondo and perhaps several others. Who DOES differ from that universe is, of course, Hajime and if you'd like, Souji. These two will look as they would in Rurouni Kenshin. I just didn't really like how the Shinsengumi looked in RK.

-Hajime is nineteen. June, 1863. Kyoto. Summer is underway-

Note: After getting my first review...(thank goodness i actually got ONE)...it was suggested that the meaning to the title be put up...so what it actually means is: i want to meet you one more time. So yesh, i'm sorry for not doing this earlier people!

--------------------------------------------------

私はあなたをもう一度会いたい

**By: Life's a cookie**

The night was endless. Darkness seemed to creep unbelievably slowly by and the silence that stretched through never sounded louder. Eyes that were accustomed with what little light the moon provided, fixed blankly onto the window. He shifted from his position on the bed and gave up on lying down. Sitting up, he leaned against the wall instead. The man stared at the clock ticking away with a loudness one never noticed until you became conscious of it. Minutes till midnight, the dread that deprived him of his sleep only grew stronger. He loathed the memory of the coming day and cursed the human nature or remembering the unwanted.

He had Tokio already for crying out loud! He should not be thinking about another woman when he had a wife, whom he told himself he cared for, waiting for his return. _Cared for..._ not love. Saitou knew that. It was a fact that he would not deny. No, there was only one woman whom he would possibly ever love. And she had already been taken away from him. Being sentimental was for the foolish. That was what he believed in. Despite that, he couldn't help but go against it. There would always inevitably be something burned into the minds of every of the swordsmen who survived the Bakumatsu. Battousai, for instance, was an idiot who could not suppress his emotions at some of the horrible images that replayed in his mind. Saitou in all honesty, wasn't one to talk but it just felt somewhat better to think that he was more capable at concealing his feelings than the moronic red head.

The minute hand finally struck home. Midnight. Heaving a weary sigh, Saitou broke away from his usually stiff posture and allowed the rush of long hidden, pent-up emotions overwhelm him as he would allow, once this day arrived. It felt like someone stabbed him but he ignored it, enduring the pain. After all, this was nothing he did not deserve.

Calloused fingers reached out to wind around his katana. The touch of the sheath both comforting and reassuring. Really, he did not enjoy having a lot of free time, simply because he knew that every second would be spent thinking about her. He just could not bring himself to forget. Did not _want _to forget. So, unfortunately, at times like these when he could not force sleep onto himself, all he could do was to succumb to fate and reminisce. His free hand fisted itself painfully. He craved to just feel her once again, to be with her. To hear her call his name. It had been years since he permitted anyone to call him Hajime. Odd to the point of being obsessed? Saitou was aware but it was as if the name had only been created for her to say. It had sounded so right coming from her. Even Tokio rarely said it and when she did so by accident, subconsciously, his face would darken and she would grow silent. It had been more common during the first few years of their marriage, before he changed his name to Goro.

Shutting his eyes to immerse himself in the past once more, he realised something. More than anything in this world, he wanted her back. Even if it only were for a while.

xX Xx

It was fifteen years ago when he first stepped into the Shinsengumi compound. Saitou was not an amateur at kendo but he knew of the standards of the numerous leaders in the group. Getting accepted was not going to be all that easy.

The two guards outside the headquarters tensed at his approach and inquired his presence brusquely. One could not blame them though. The smile he bore had an irremovable cold edge to it and most of the time it served as his mask.

He was met with an uncountable number of hostile stares amidst curious ones as he was led to the dojo. Apparently strangers weren't well received… The training ground was filled with the clattering of bamboo swords and the harsh yells of their owners. Sitting at the head of the room, observing the men with amusement was the commander, Kondo Isami.

_Quite the cheery one isn't he, _Saitou mused to himself.

"Stay here."

Saitou glared icily after the form of the guard who was approaching the seated man. He watched in silence at the change in facial expressions. _Highly entertaining…_ The older man stood abruptly, tossing the unsuspecting guard into a startled frenzy at the sudden movement. Like an overgrown child, Kondo clapped his hands and hollered over the noise of practice. All activities instantly stopped, attention focused on the commander.

"We've got ourselves another new one, boys!" Just like that, all eyes now centred onto him. Saitou felt himself raise an irritated eyebrow at the challenging looks on the faces of the members, sizing him up. Shifting his gaze to the overly excited man, he was just in time to see the gesture that was made to get him over. Following obediently, eyes back to its closed 'smile', Saitou walked to bow before the leader.

"What would be your name, young sir," he was asked heartily.

"Hajime, Saitou. Kondo-sama," he answered with earnest respect.

"You wish to join us, do you? Then show me what you've got. Someone fetch him a shinai." Some man mingled amongst the crowd scurried to carry out the order. "Well then, who shall you go against…" Kondo wondered aloud.

"Anyone would be fine, Kondo-sama" Saitou replied with a small inclination of his head, muttering a thanks to the one who handed him the wooden sword.

"Anyone? Alright, Souji, come out here!"

xX Xx

The young woman lifted her head from where it had been – stuck in a book. Hazy grey eyes lit up in a flash.

"New…"she uttered, the book quickly forgotten on the table. The brush in Hijikata's hand froze mid-air, interrupted by the voice.

"What?" was the slightly annoyed question.

"Probably a new one trying to enter, Hijikata-san," the girl said, turning to face him from where her back once was. Hijikata remained silent, hearing out for the usual destructive noise from the dojo. Hearing cheering instead of the smashing of sword against sword, he nodded.

"So it would seem." The man then returned to his work of conquering the documents, as if he truly did not know that this would not be the end to the matter. His eye twitched when he felt the unrelenting stare of a certain brown-haired female. With a slam of his hand, he looked up. "What is it now?!"

"Could I pleaaase?" she pleaded pitifully.

"Since when did you take interest in watching those matches?"

Hands on hips, she glowered at him, the wanted effect flawed by an instinctive pout.

"I've always watched them, Hijikata-san! You just don't care enough to notice!" This statement only made said man glare daggers. The defiance slipped away and a helpless smile took over. "Please?"

An exhausted sigh was her reply. A squeal ensued as she bounded out of her guardian's room.

"Idiot… Oi! Kanryuu!" Hijikata yelled after her, hurriedly following her footsteps.

It wasn't that she didn't hear the infuriated man. It was more of her choosing to ignore it. That was until, of course, she caught a loud curse and a shout saying, "You stupid girl! Wait! I swear, if your brother had not made me take you in, I would have-"

A _certain_ woeful look shut him up.

"I'm sorry." She muttered with a bow. Narrowed eyes widened slightly at the sudden apology. The girl was known for surprises, that much he knew and was used to, but the abruptness of her throwing them at him never ceased to stun him. "…but if we don't hurry, it would be over by the time we finally get there. Pleaaase, Hijikata-san…" And right after he felt a pang of guilt, her finished sentence would trot over that and leave him feeling scammed.

"Let's go…" He walked past the girl, black yukata blowing in the wind, giving off his air of intimidation without even doing anything. Kanryuu beamed and skipped after the man.

Upon entering the dojo, the sight of the men gathered around the pair greeted them. With the sheer number of people, it was inconceivably hard to even get a glimpse of the sparring. Kanryuu looked like a hyperactive bunny, almost bouncing from excitement right on the spot. Literally.

"Will you calm down, kid?" an amused smirk. Feigning offended, her face spelled out outrage.

"I am **not **a _kid_! Fifteen! I'm fifteen already!" Kanryuu protested furiously. Some annoyed man unknown to the girl amidst the crowd turned and tried to locate the source of the loud yelling…and immediately broke out in a sweat upon realising it had been Hijikata and catching the death glare from the female.

"Then start bloody acting like a fifteen!"

"Hijikata-san," an emotionless voice called out. Two heads turned.

"Aa…Susumu."

"Susumu-senpai!" Kanryuu greeted with insane merriment.

"Would you like me to relieve her of you for a while?" the man inquired in barely over a whisper. Hijikata looked like someone had presented him with a fresh supply for his pipe. With a push, the older man shoved the girl into Susumu's hands and rushed away.

A pause.

"Anou…"

"Follow me. There is a spot in here that they do not know of." Kanryuu blinked and followed.

"Ne, senpai, who is it today?"

"Someone called Saito Hajime, if I did not hear wrongly."

A thoughtful expression crossed her flawless face as she further questioned, "That would mean 'Hajime' is his name isn't it? And Saito would be his family name?"

Susumu stopped at a space behind the mob. "En. That's right," he replied looking over his shoulder. The teenager looked around, a small frown forming.

"How is this…-" Kanryuu watched as the man knelt and leapt up towards the ceiling. He pushed open a panel and pulled himself up into an unfamiliar place.

"…Oh"

She mimicked the action albeit with a slight problem when it came to pulling herself up. A grin played across her lips as she looked at the fight below.

"Susumu-senpai…you're so selfish," the young woman taunted. Said man coloured faintly, much to her joy. He rarely, if not never, displayed any emotion but she was seemingly the only one who could break that trait from time to time. Then again, just to be safe since she didn't really want to awake to several kunais stabbed around her…., "I was just joking…ne?"

Susumu allowed a small smile. Relieved, Kanryuu turned her attention back on the two men. The loud clashing of shinais resounded clearly over the quietened chatter.

"Anou…he seems rather good." The taller of the two had his black hair tied back, several strands falling over face but this was all she could make out since he was only turned slightly.

"He still requires more practice," Susumu commented.

"Eh…I guess you're right," a wince at how Souji's sword came down hard on a shin.

"Souji-senpai's not relenting as usual." A lunge, a sweep and there was a thud as the body hit the floor. "Well that was fa-"

Her companion noticed the unwarranted silence. A sudden anxiety swept through him. Grey eyes were wide and wild.

"Kanryuu…" he tested.

"Ani…" her voice was unnervingly distant.

"Kanryuu…!" the man said more firmly.

She snapped towards the voice.

"It's fine, senpai. I'm still here," she reassured with a forced smile. Her paler face, however, gave her away.

"Come. It has finished."

Without another word, he had his arms under her neck and knee. Jumping, he landed with a soft thump. Kanryuu had long given up on arguing about these sorts of things (where she being treated like some fragile creature was concerned) whenever the man deemed her unwell. Because he was right. Usually.

Shouts of approval had broken out once more and the usual noise returned to its normal volume. The two made their way to the front where Kondo was pounding the one supposedly called Saito, on the back. Poor man… but no one could save _anyone_ from the commander's form of encouragement which was sadly…physically harming. They spotted Hijikata easily. There could only be one person who managed to radiate hostility as if it were an aura that stuck about him. He stood leaning against a wall, worry evident from his face.

"Hijikata-san" The instinctive glare changed its target to Susumu. Its severity subsequently softened upon seeing the source of his worry behind the speaker. With a hushed voice, "She should return." The older man's frown deepened at the spoken words. Kanryuu still bore her innocent blank look but she was uneasy.

"I expected it…...I was trying find the both of you," he murmured, righting himself from his position.

"I'm very sorry," the quiet man apologised, completing it with a low bow.

"Kanryuu, we're going back."

The brunette raised her head to meet his eyes before looking away, oddly dazed as she acknowledged the statement with a "Hai."

xX Xx

"Hijikata-san…?" the teenager called out softly. Slender fingers closed the book, whose one page she had been reading for more than ten times. Nothing was getting through.

"What is it?" the man growled distractedly. He did not stop his writing.

"Did he get in?"

Grey eyes followed his every move, making sure he answered. Hijikata pinched the bridge of his nose. He definitely felt an impending headache.

"Aa…I was against it but Isami felt a decision could not be hindered by such personal reasons even though he knew the possible consequences. The goddamn fact just remains that the boy's got talent."

An uncontrollable tug at the corners of his lips got the better of him and the man felt slight relief at the small 'o' Kanryuu's mouth had shaped into. At least her normal self was returning. Perhaps she wasn't getting as affected……that, or she was learning to shield her emotions. Hijikata frowned in annoyance. Damn her and the blasted training he'd allowed her to continue with, thinking it'd do her good. The stupid thing was backfiring. He should be able to read her clearly, not hamper him. _Just brilliant, Toshi. The one time you don't think things through…_

Thud. Thud. Thud. The man broke away from his thoughts and eyed the small (in comparison to his own) finger that was tapping the tatami in a uniformed fashion. _Hell._

"Don't you _dare _go and do something that will only give you more pain, understand, Kid?"

His response? An overly sweet smile. He knew his advice wasn't going to work. Sometimes he didn't even know why he bothered. It was so clear she was going to be up to something mischievous when she began tapping.

It was a bad habit she had yet to get rid of.

---------------------

**Translation: **

1. Ani- It's suppose to be Aniki or Ani-san. They both mean older brother.

2. Aa- I guess it's a sort of sound you make in acknowledgement?

**A.N.: **Well, that's that. Do forgive any mistakes in spelling or otherwise. Hope you thought it was passable. My apologies to those who actually want the next chapter up... It won't be up till quite a while later because I've got the end of year exams in one week and it spans over two weeks so, go figure, eh? Well, till next time people!!...Review?


End file.
